You get to a certain point in your life where all your friends are getting married. A seemingly endless stream of hen parties and weddings.
So I think I have now come to the next stage in this cycle where my friends are all separating and divorcing. In some cases divorcing before I even knew of a separation.
Which makes me wonder why couples in this day and age bother at all. With stats as they are, and no stigma attached to “living in sin”, why do couples bother?
Personally, for me, I am anti-marriage. I see no point. In the eyes of the law, everything we own is half mine. I would never change my name. And, I don’t believe marriages or even couples last forever.
Both of our respective parents have separated since we have been together – chances are at some point one of us will want out for some reason.
Some may say that not being married means it’s easier to walk away. I don’t see it like this. I think it makes us respect the fact that our partner could in deed do just that with relative ease and therefore making us work together towards our common goals.
When I hear of the huge costs involved in having a wedding, I fail to comprehend why. Sure you can try to do it on a budget but let’s face it, it’s still going to cost a small fortune that most couples starting their lives together could probably use to pay a deposit on a home or a chunk of their mortgage. This is just nuts!
I suspect part of the reason for the high divorce rate is that people expect to be “in love” with their partner their whole life and have that same spark like in the beginning of a new relationship.
Unrealistic expectations. Part of that initial spark is getting to know someone new. After a few years, it wears off, and after you realise that he farts in bed and picks his nose, you have to find something to love about that person you are sharing your life with.
When he makes you laugh daily, gets you a bucket when you are feeling sick and buys you chocolate when you have your period, these are the things that really matter.
And by far the absolute worst thing is staying together because of the children. They are not stupid and are very adaptable. Having unhappy parents sticking it out is so much worse than living apart or in two separate homes.
I think romantic comedy movies have a lot to answer for, pretty girl, gorgeous guy…. Romance ensues and bingo she catches her man. Real men aren’t like that and sure as hell most women aren’t like that either.
Note I said catches her man… Because there is nothing like holding someone captive to make them want to escape…